Songs to Complain By – Final chapter

Here are the last two pages of the songbook: Songs to Complain By

First up, from “Passengers will please refrain…”

Our version:
I fill out my 1040 form/ then I fill it out again/ I’m getting sick and tired of filling it
— OUT!
—–
Soooo, Congressmen will please refrain/ From voting money down the drain
While talking lower taxes,/ It’s not new, OH!
—-
I can tell by your expression,/ That you won the last election…

That’s the way in a republic, No one cares about the public.
—-
I can see by your elation/ You have [fill in your own verb] the whole damn nation.

You have been so energetic,/ People think that you’re prophetic.

Everyone has been confused,/ What’s the line that you have used?
—-
What’s this thing that I have wrote (sic)?/ That’s my ballot? That’s my vote?
—-
Tired of seeing all those faces,/ In those crazy far-off places.
—-
I can see from your expression,/ That you fear a new recession.

There are times when it is wiser,/ Not to try to be a Keiser.

Our songbook inspired our children, so about 10 years later, two more songs were added. We think it adds a new, more sophisticated, less political layer to the work.

THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL [based, naturally, on “The First Day of Christmas…”]

On the first day of school,/ my teacher gave to me:/ FEARS of impending boredom.
. . . second . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Two forms to fill, and..
. . . third . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Three primary colors,
. . . fourth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Four food groups,
. . . fifth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ FIVE GOLDEN BOOKS
. . . sixth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Six locker number
. . . seventh . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Seven maps to make
. . . eighth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Eight tests to take
. . . ninth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Nine times nine
. . . tenth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Ten playground rules
. . . eleventh . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Eleven teacher’s aides
. . . twelfth . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ./ Twelve homework assignments…
And FEARS of impending boredom.

And last, but not least, to the tune of “There’s a Hole in the Bottom of the Sea”
which we (DDH and IFO) learned from an English language record by a popular American singing in Europe in the 1960s, entitled “Bill Ramsey Singt Lieder Seiner Heimat” purchased in Switzerland. We found an older, more classical version of this song on YouTube:

Our title is a bit different: THERE’S A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM OF THE SCHOOL

There’s a hole in the bottom of the school…
There’s a dumb little kid in the hole of the bottom of the school,
There’s a teacher’s aide for the dumb . . . .
There’s a teacher-on-the-back of the teacher’s aide . . .
There’s a secretary calling the teacher-on-the-back . . .
There’s a principal listening to the secretary caling . . .
There’s a superintendent bugging the principal listening . . .
There’s a school board riding the superindendent bugging . . .
* * *
No, there ain’t no hole, we done filled up the hole in the bottom of the School!!!

Our daughter, the brilliant electrical engineer, then just a brilliant student, suggested the following, darker and more realistic, additional verses:

There are parents nagging the dumb little kid . . .
There’s a teacher’s aide threatening the parents . . .
* * * *
No, there ain’t no hole, we done killed the dumb little kid in the hole in the bottom of the school!

That’s all, folks!

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About InvestingforOne

I've been investing in various assets by myself using a discount broker for many years. Over that time, I've developed some theories that others might find useful. Plus, there is more to investing than money. Time, talent, work, friends, family all go into developing a good and satisfactory strategy.
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